Friday, September 26, 2008
Could It Get Any Weirder?
The pregnancy with the boys was just so normal. This is so unreal to me!
The ultrasound at 5 weeks revealed the one sac implanted in the uterus. This was great news! The ultrasound at 6 weeks revealed 2 sacs, only one with a heartbeat. The ultrasound this week (7 weeks) revealed 2 sacs both with a heartbeat! AMAZING! To those of you that are praying, I thank you. From the bottom of my heart. You are doing great work.
The heart rates are at 130 (Baby A) and 133 (Baby B). Dr. Robins says this is still slow. They are both a couple days behind on growth. Dr. Robins tells me that it is 2 more weeks of freaking out and then if they are still growing slow (and both still viable) then we'll do more tests to make sure nothing else is wrong. YIKES! My nurse coordinator, Nina, and my favorite nurse, Karen, say that the embryos look really good and that I should be feeling more relieved now. :)
We are telling our families shortly, as in this weekend and today. I'm going to go rest while Dan makes the shirts. Please keep praying. I'm still super scared! Thanks for all your continued support and prayers!
**Blog won't let me post the ultrasound picture from today! I'll try again later!
The ultrasound at 5 weeks revealed the one sac implanted in the uterus. This was great news! The ultrasound at 6 weeks revealed 2 sacs, only one with a heartbeat. The ultrasound this week (7 weeks) revealed 2 sacs both with a heartbeat! AMAZING! To those of you that are praying, I thank you. From the bottom of my heart. You are doing great work.
The heart rates are at 130 (Baby A) and 133 (Baby B). Dr. Robins says this is still slow. They are both a couple days behind on growth. Dr. Robins tells me that it is 2 more weeks of freaking out and then if they are still growing slow (and both still viable) then we'll do more tests to make sure nothing else is wrong. YIKES! My nurse coordinator, Nina, and my favorite nurse, Karen, say that the embryos look really good and that I should be feeling more relieved now. :)
We are telling our families shortly, as in this weekend and today. I'm going to go rest while Dan makes the shirts. Please keep praying. I'm still super scared! Thanks for all your continued support and prayers!
**Blog won't let me post the ultrasound picture from today! I'll try again later!
Monday, September 22, 2008
F-R-U-S-T-R-A-T-I-N-G
Wow, I am frustrated! We just got a whole bunch of bills in the mail. My initial fee of $3805 for the In-Vitro covered up until a positive pregnancy test. Since then, I've had about 16 blood draws and once a week ultrasounds. My bill came in the mail today. Because they are not a preferred provider with my military insurance, they are allowed to charge me 115% more than what my insurance accepts. And they do. So, my insurance covers about $3 of every blood draw. My bill for last week, $200. Super. This works out well. And I can't change until 8 weeks when released from Dr. Robins. I may speak with them and see if there's another way around it. ARG!
Thursday, September 18, 2008
Ultrasound and Heartbeat
Have I ever told you I'm not patient? I think I am losing my mind!The appointment this morning was full of surprises and scariness (kind of my typical appointment right now). When he first focused on my uterus I could see two sacs. They are both still there. Unfortunately, only one has a heartbeat. This is still great news. However, he (Dr. Robins) says that it's still about 3 days too slow. I'm still skimming the bottom line on whether or not the pregnancy is viable. He said he wouldn't be surprised if there was no heartbeat next week. That is scary!
Who knows what we'll do now. I'm thinking we'll just tell our families, but not in a big announcement type way like planned, but instead a calmer matter-of-fact way. Not sure yet. I do need to find someone to give me an injection on Fri and Sat since Dan will be out of town. ARG!
Big Appointment
Tomorrow is my big appointment. I'm extremely nervous. It feels like this week has been the best week so far, but that makes me even more nervous!
We realized tonight that I think I'm allergic to the band-aids that we put on after injections. The injection site gets really itchy and swollen and is just miserable. I realized today that it feels a lot better once I pull the band-aid off. You'd think I'd make that connection sooner. We are trying a new band-aid tonight and so far, it appears to be much better. Gotta love those lightbulb moments!
We realized tonight that I think I'm allergic to the band-aids that we put on after injections. The injection site gets really itchy and swollen and is just miserable. I realized today that it feels a lot better once I pull the band-aid off. You'd think I'd make that connection sooner. We are trying a new band-aid tonight and so far, it appears to be much better. Gotta love those lightbulb moments!
Saturday, September 13, 2008
Positive from Amber
First off, I know I've been negative Nellie, but my body has just not felt right. However, two nights ago my boobs started hurting. And I mean hurting! This makes me want to shout with joy. And today, I was making bread and I started feeling a little nauseous and gagging. This also made me really excited! HOORAY! My body is finally starting to feel pregnant. That, to me, feels like a good sign. Now if only I could start puking regularly!
The last two nights, Dan has given me the nightly progesterone shot. On Thursday, we were at home. I got up from the shot and Dan looked at me, "Oh crap, you're bleeding!" It was all the way down into the waist-line of my shorts, so those were nice and bloody! OOPS! This is what happens when you do injections in the same area for an extended amount of time...you begin to run out of spots and start hitting bruises, and the bleeding after injections becomes more common. Last night, we were at a friends house for dinner and cards, and when Dan went to warm up the meds at 8:30, he realized he'd forgotten them at home. ARG! We had to pack up quickly and get home. Last night's injection was not only not warmed (so it HURT), but it also bled. ARG!
On a yucky note, my backside is so swollen and tender, I can't wear pants anymore. I wear some shorts that are lose, but those aren't real good for the public. :) I have 2 dresses, that a friend gave me, and those have been my lifeline. If totally necessary, I wear something uncomfortable out, and as soon as I step through the door, I get into pajamas (no matter the time of day). :) I can't wait to either know that this is a viable pregnancy and just wear maternity pants that wont' hurt my backside, or know it's not viable and get back in shape so I can wear my normal clothes from pre-IVF. :)
The last two nights, Dan has given me the nightly progesterone shot. On Thursday, we were at home. I got up from the shot and Dan looked at me, "Oh crap, you're bleeding!" It was all the way down into the waist-line of my shorts, so those were nice and bloody! OOPS! This is what happens when you do injections in the same area for an extended amount of time...you begin to run out of spots and start hitting bruises, and the bleeding after injections becomes more common. Last night, we were at a friends house for dinner and cards, and when Dan went to warm up the meds at 8:30, he realized he'd forgotten them at home. ARG! We had to pack up quickly and get home. Last night's injection was not only not warmed (so it HURT), but it also bled. ARG!
On a yucky note, my backside is so swollen and tender, I can't wear pants anymore. I wear some shorts that are lose, but those aren't real good for the public. :) I have 2 dresses, that a friend gave me, and those have been my lifeline. If totally necessary, I wear something uncomfortable out, and as soon as I step through the door, I get into pajamas (no matter the time of day). :) I can't wait to either know that this is a viable pregnancy and just wear maternity pants that wont' hurt my backside, or know it's not viable and get back in shape so I can wear my normal clothes from pre-IVF. :)
Waiting A Week
I'm pretty sure we've decided to wait until after next week's appointment to tell our families. When we tell our families, I want to be able to be fully invested and excited. At this point, I'm being told that there is still a good chance that the pregnancy is not viable, so I need to remain guarded.
Dan confided in me yesterday that he's pretty worried about me. We had a long talk and he felt better. I explained to him that this is my way of coping. I cannot get too excited about this. If that happens, and it's negative, I will fall deep into depression, and want to do another series immediately. That is not possible with Dan getting laid off and our current situation. As of this point, I am guardedly excited. If this doesn't work, I will be ok. I will obviously need to go through some sort of grieving, but I know that we have other things to focus on in our lives. And we can go through it again and do it at another time when the timing is better. If it's a positive appointment next week, I'll be fully in and there will be no stopping the emotions then! After this conversation, Dan felt better and kind of knew more of where I am coming from.
I don't think anyone can truly understand how difficult this is, unless you've been there. You can feel your body, you know exactly what is going on. This is difficult for either someone who has never gone through this, or the spouse going through it but not able to feel it.
Dan confided in me yesterday that he's pretty worried about me. We had a long talk and he felt better. I explained to him that this is my way of coping. I cannot get too excited about this. If that happens, and it's negative, I will fall deep into depression, and want to do another series immediately. That is not possible with Dan getting laid off and our current situation. As of this point, I am guardedly excited. If this doesn't work, I will be ok. I will obviously need to go through some sort of grieving, but I know that we have other things to focus on in our lives. And we can go through it again and do it at another time when the timing is better. If it's a positive appointment next week, I'll be fully in and there will be no stopping the emotions then! After this conversation, Dan felt better and kind of knew more of where I am coming from.
I don't think anyone can truly understand how difficult this is, unless you've been there. You can feel your body, you know exactly what is going on. This is difficult for either someone who has never gone through this, or the spouse going through it but not able to feel it.
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